The loose knots.

Yes,Esha was back..with all her boytalk.FUCK.when will people realise im having just too much of it?
Yes yes,She was with me..for an hour..telling me how everyguy runs after her..(and i hate to bear it)..but ahh,finally I made my escape (thumbs up to Mariahs mom).Too tired.the bloody cramps are just too much..I realised I couldnt walk anymore.
There was the perfect spot,the football net ..ahh in the sun.lovely.I settled down and began to search for sarah..I dont know why,I wanted to tell HER everything.I feel this sensation of wanting my friends every now and then.
No luck.Shes probabbly gone.
Resting my head in my lap i kindof dozed off for a minute or two and was up when she called me.
Oh damn.
A conversation of what..two minutes?
'hows life?'..I dont know If im imagining it or it was there but I felt that little feel of wanting to share everything of mine.
She probabbly knows.
Oh comeon she would.
But as usual..I lost my gut sanu..I really did.and lied everything was fine.
I wish we couldve talked for a minute or two..I felt she'd open it all up but ahh..mama was there to pick me
*mwah*..take care Sarah.
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Im waiting for saturday now,I hope to tell her everything.You know sanu..its just so lonely..and so empty
My world is all of a sudden so..different.
I miss misha so much..I was probabbly to blame for everything.I shouldnt have trusted him in the first place.
Hes left me so unfinished.
Haha,I remember nijhu telling me.'Hes going to regret everything one day.'
Im not sure nijhu,Hes probabbly happy right now..chilling with his friends
Making plans for sunday...with me..mourning over myself.
They say I should be happy if he is..but everytime I see his bitch,think of them together..It makes me so invisible..
So not there.I dont know if I can listen to the same songs shery,I really dont know.
..I still love him.