Good old I

Good old I got a haircut after the LONGESSSST time.
Good old I is supposed to be looking nice.
Good old I has a little difficulty in seeing.
Good old I is happy
:D
oh and good old I is bathing regularly these days :d

so the deal is..
i dont like talking to this blog anymore.
i want to rant.and i want to cry bad.but i dont know how to say it to this asshole.
I'm not comfortable with my blog.
i need to write so bad but i dont know what to write.
I am depressed and in dire need of help or i might suicide.
no thats not a threat
why?
because there isnt anyone whos reading this and will potentially feel threatened.
i really need to die.
and if someone thinks i'm joking.well,
i dont feel any lighter and i wish someone would just listen to all i have to say and then hug me.
and listen and hug me again
:(
and that someone would make me feel human and existant again
or someone would slap me now and put me to sleep
or give me a lexotinel?(if that is how you spell it)
and for heavensake i dont even care if that isnt how you spell it.BECAUSE I SPELL IT THAT WAY.

Har kisi ko.

Har kisi ko mukammal jahan nahin milta
kahin zamee kahin aasma nahin milta.


oh and yes,i might suicide once i find a painless way to
lets listen to roobaroo.

I really want something bad to happen to me and i want to see how many people cry and i want to know which ones really cry alot.
I want that.and i want to know how it feels to have so many people worried for you,not for you to be pretty,not for your weight,not for your intellect,not for your conduct,just for you.

i dont like my life.
i dont like anyones life.
i want something bad to happen to me.something which doesent hurt me but makes people cry for me.
i want people to cry for me.

and i know thats mean.
BUT I WANT IT.